How to know if your boss is sending you a message: ‘Up Yours’

How to know if your boss is sending you a message: ‘Up Yours’

“I’ll talk to [redacted] about the mess he left in the sink.”

“Yea, whatever. It’s always nice to receive a healthy ‘Up Yours’ from your boss at five in the morning.”

“Well, I don’t know if it’s an ‘up YOURS’ to, like, you, specifically.”

“Well, unfortunately, you can’t control the way that others interpret your actions.”

“…”

September | week one in poetry

September | week one in poetry

Ding, Dong! The Witch Is Gone!

  • Apparently, the quickest way to get an entitled white lady boomer to quit her job is to enforce her job duties, i.e. make her DO her job. 
  • And my initial reaction was to write about the whole situation.
  • And then, I realized, there’s no need to draw the attention.

Monarchy

  • Hierarchy is the antithesis of equality. Duh.

Subscriber

  • I understand the addictive quality of attention.

Freedom

  • Is this what it feels like to get older?

Dear Commenter

  • Being mean on the internet requires a certain level of stupidity, that level being—dumbfuck. Wanna engage in thoughtful dialogue? Come at me with your own post. 

Choice Architecture

  • Pay me to learn something for you, as this is my dream job.

Explain something to me …

  • There’s an incomparable difference between proving that you understand something and making someone else understand what you understand about that same something. 

Sucks for Sucks

  • There is something truly (cocksuckingly) hot about a man who knows his way around a house with a vacuum.

How to spot a “christ follower”:

  • There’s nothing humble about evangelizing/proselytizing. 
  • The hypocrite is first and foremost a liar. 
  • The only reliable thing about a liar is that he/she/they will lie.
  • And so, the truth will always be a lie.
BLACK WIDOW isn’t a bad movie; it’s a bad Marvel Movie.

BLACK WIDOW isn’t a bad movie; it’s a bad Marvel Movie.

As a movie that falls more effectively within the genre of “assassin” movies (i’m thinking “Bond, James Bond”), Natasha Romanoff is a female killing machine fighting through female issues among other females who all have to “deal with” the problems of patriarchy (and misogyny) in a world where women have to figure out, combat, and resolve “women’s issues” all by themselves … a cold, cruel reflection of the world in which we (females and those punished by society for possessing a pussy [or merely desiring to be &or identifying as pussy-laden]) already live and exist.

Patriarchy is real. (Obviously, i’ve understood this before seeing this movie.)

I watched the movie for the first time the day after it’s opening date. The details of my viewing will remain vague as i do not wish to detail … the details of my life. Nevertheless, i watched the flick on opening weekend, and then i watched it again this morning (roughly between 0445 & 0700).

It (the movie) was a lot better during this second viewing; so much so, in fact, that i’m writing about it now. I had no such predilection after the first watching.

After the general online reception seemed to be pretty bland &or divisive, i had nothing else to add to the noise that my phone brought forth, but then i thought i’d waste some time this morning, so i watched the movie again.

And to my surprise, i liked it this go around. Full disclosure, i AM a Scarlett Johansson fan. It’s weird cause i don’t really like her movies (and don’t even get me started on that walk! Julia Roberts much [and this is not a good thing, imho]?) But this is all trivial nonsense, and i try, i must try to always refrain from judging my fellow females in trite and trivial ways. Nevertheless, there aren’t very many “Scar-Jo” movies that are good, no offense, and yes, as an asian female, i was pissed that she was cast in Ghost In The Shell, etc., etc., &c. The point is that i’m not a Scar-Jo hater. I like her, and i think she’s pretty fucking hot. She’s also part of the “problem.” But that’s not the point here.

The point, for me, is that i’m not here to hate on a Scar-Jo movie. I liked Black Widow, and i like Scarlett Johansson in it.

The reason i’m saying all of this is that i couldn’t actually help but think of Scarlett Johansson the entire time i was watching “Natasha Romanoff” on screen.

I couldn’t help thinking about the burden that Scarlett Johansson has had to endure being the ONLY female in the sausage fest that is the MCU. Full disclosure, i am a huge Marvel fan. I’ve seen all of the movies, in order, as they’ve come out, and i’ve seen every movie since 2014 in IMAX 3D. All i’m saying is that i’ve shelled out a large portion of my disposable income to the creation of the MCU, and i’ve watched intently to make sure my money has/is being spent well.

Thus, Black Widow is a shit addition to the MCU. Black Widow is a pretty good action flick.

The problem, for me (and yes, i am only speaking for myself [i sorta can’t believe i even have to “qualify” myself in this way, but here we are, stuck in woke-america, and so, i conform]), is that Black Widow doesn’t add to the Canon, and so, i wish that it had been made into a ten-part series with each episode a different era of Romanoff’s life wherein she’s a fucking badass, killing fools, and making a name for herself. It coulda been a whole vibe. But i understand that maybe Johansson is a bit old to begin a streaming series, just from a physical sense, i hear that all that action takes a toll on the body. And yea, the movie, generally speaking, was a disappointment in the sense that Johansson gracefully introduced her replacement. Whether or not Johansson, herself, is/was ready to bow out and make way for a new, young star doesn’t really matter in this moment. What matters is that this is what happened at all.

Natasha Romanoff has been with us since (basically) the very beginning. I remember when Scar-Jo appeared in Iron Man 2, and the surprise was a delight (i mean, she’s so hot). And then she worked very hard, in (basically) every movie, fighting through the MCU as the sole female of men with issues bigger than the mere problems of females suffering from the patriarchy here on Earth. Boo. Boooooooooo.

Black Widow ended up being a metaphor of Scarlett Johansson’s role in the MCU.

And all of this as a fuck-you farewell. And it’s still a good movie. It will just be forgotten within the larger Canon because that’s what men do in a patriarchy. How fucking sad.

And so, i end up seeing Scarlett Johansson within the larger context of “hollywood,” and then the movie ends up standing as an even larger metaphor for Scarlett Johansson in the larger existence of HOLLYWOOD.

She’s phenomenally silent in this #MeToo era.

She’s phenomenally successful as a beautiful woman in show biz.

She’s prodigiously flattered in the press.

She’s “perfect,” and her career will continue to steam right along as long as she keeps her mouth shut, which it seems, she’s willing to do.

And so, this is not where i thought that this … thought would end up, but here we are now.

I’m officially wondering if Scar-Jo, the actor and representative of beauty, can really, all by herself, take down this patriarchal world in which we live by simply telling us what she knows. I am now officially wondering this.

Why Keegan-Michael Key doesn’t know anything.

Why Keegan-Michael Key doesn’t know anything.

When Keegan-Michael Key appeared on Stephen Colbert’s The Late Show (12July21), I realized that he didn’t really know anything. He sorta just babbles, and then flails around a bit. This is not to say that he’s not entertaining. He simply doesn’t come off as someone who knows a lot of things. During his time in the spotlight, he harkened back to an era, a mere hundreds of years ago, when the idea of “the variety show” birthed what we essentially understand today as late-night comedy.

I beg to differ.

According to E. O. Wilson in his The Origins of Creativity, Wilson argues that the domestication of fire is what essentially created humanity’s first leisure time, which then birthed the notion of campfire entertainment as the day wound down toward sleep. Members of the community would share stories, perhaps even sing songs, and perhaps even do a bit of reenacting, one imagines. This, then, would be the birth of the idea of humans entertaining other humans for the pure pleasure of it, late at night.

As much as I’d love to go along with this notion that some modern (unmentioned but assumed) white man, who’s now perceived as a genius for coming up with this idea of entertaining people at nighttime, I simply cannot, in good faith, give this idea any further traction than simply stating that this idea of nighttime entertainment is ANCIENT. It’s an intrinsic aspect of what makes us human because this idea of nighttime entertainment is prehistoric. It’s so obvious the cavemen thought of it. So, not only does this idea not require genius, but also, it’s not really an idea so much as a human essence.

So sure, I will support an idea that revolves around how nice it is to have people who still crave to entertain us through whichever medium is “hot” for the times, but I will not support an idea that revolves around a modern (white) man being the “creator” of something that’s so intrinsically human. Obviously, there are better and worse entertainers, and as entertainers go, Key is not someone I find entertaining, and as of late, actually, I’m finding Colbert to be less and less entertaining, but that seems like a whole post unto itself.

For now, that’s all I’ve got, so there’s that.

Until next time.